


The Devil's Sing-Off

by Antarctic_Echoes



Series: Luciferian Fics (One shots) [23]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-02
Updated: 2017-03-02
Packaged: 2018-09-27 22:02:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10053353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antarctic_Echoes/pseuds/Antarctic_Echoes
Summary: Lucifer decides to win a singing contest for Chloe.  The music choice isn't what he's expecting, though....Takes place sometime after S2x10 but before the kiss of S2x11 so... slightly AU.one-shot.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is dedicated to Barbara, who gave me the prompt, “Lucifer and Amenadiel, of course we can sing, we are angels!” Sorry it took so long. I hope it’s everything you hoped for.
> 
> This has not been beta-ed, so I apologize for any mistakes.
> 
>  
> 
> Disclaimer: Lucifer Morningstar, Chloe Decker, Amenadiel and Dan Espinoza are owned by Vertigo Comics, DC Comics, Neil Gaiman, Mike Carey, and everyone else involved with the Lucifer TV show and comic books. I own nothing and make no money on this. I merely am borrowing the characters for... uh... writing practice.

 

 

Lucifer Morningstar was having a lot of fun at the precinct.  There was nothing quite like torturing the douche on a paperwork day.  Chloe had told him to stay out of trouble, so he kept himself busy by shooting rubber bands at Dan’s head.  He shot them from across the bullpen -- those little pieces of circular rubber were mighty powerful when pulled back as far as they could go, and he had the satisfaction of watching the Douche yelp in pain every time he got zinged.  Of course he had to hide behind a file cabinet so that Dan would never suspect it was him, but he was the Devil -- no one was better at hiding than him!

“What are you doing?”

Lucifer jumped at the sound of Chloe’s voice from behind him.  Bloody hell, she was always sneaking up on him at the most inopportune times!  Whirling around, he pasted a smile on his face as he stuffed the rubber bands into his trouser pocket.  His heart gave a little stutter as he took in her beautiful aqua eyes -- which were narrowed dangerously -- and her kissable lips, currently pulled down in a frown.  “Detective!  I thought you were busy working...?”

“I am, but Lieutenant Monroe put me in charge of gathering people for the annual sing-off.”

Lifting an eyebrow, he stared at her in puzzlement. “Annual sing-off?”

Chloe nodded.  “Yep.  Every year the homicide detectives and the vice squad get together and have a singing competition.  Whoever wins gets the honor of having the sing-off trophy in their break room until the next contest.”

The fallen angel’s brow furrowed.  “I haven’t seen a trophy in the break room....”

“That’s because we haven’t won in five years.”  She shook her head.  “We’re just not singers, but....”

“But?”

Hope shone on her face as she looked up at him.  “You can sing, can’t you?  I mean, you own LUX and you play the piano --”

He thrust his chest out and smiled.  “Of course, Detective!  Singing is what I do best!  Well, next to punishment, of course.”

Chloe’s lips quirked into a crooked smile.  “Of course.  Great.  I’ll pair you with Dan.”

“Dan?!”  Lucifer was horrified.  “The douche?!  Why must I sing with him?”

Chloe frowned.  “Because the rules are that everyone competes in pairs.  Besides, I thought you were having a little bromance --”

Lucifer shuddered.  “Absolutely not!  He slept with Mu-- uhhh....”  His brow furrowed.  “But why must I sing with him?  Why can’t I sing with you?  After all, we’re partners.”

Chloe’s face fell as her shoulders slumped.  Her face grew pensive and she looked away.  “Oh, I can’t sing. I’m tone deaf.”

Lucifer’s chest tightened at his partner’s expression, although he wasn’t sure exactly why.  He hated seeing her upset, and right now she looked heartbroken at her inability to sing.  He decided right then and there that he would win the sing-off trophy for her -- somehow.

Thinking fast, he asked, “Do I have to be paired with a detective?”

She shook her head.  “No.  Some of the detectives sing with their wives.  As long as one of you works in the department, you qualify.”  She tapped her chin as she thought.  “Maybe you could sing with Ella?  Oh wait, she said she couldn’t make it --”

The fallen angel made an executive decision.  “Sign Amenadiel up.”

Chloe’s eyebrows rose.  “Your brother?  Can he sing?”

Lucifer gave her an indulgent smile.  “Detective, of course we can sing -- we are angels!”

She snorted.  “Right.  Sure.  Whatever, Lucifer.  Okay, I’ll sign you both up as a team.  The sing-off is this Friday.”

As Lucifer watched his partner wander away, the smile slid from his face.  Now he had to convince his stick-in-the-mud brother to sing....

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

“I’m not singing.”

Lucifer frowned at his brother as he poured him a drink.  Amenadiel had been standoffish lately, but the fallen angel had hoped that inviting him over might defrost some of the ice in their relationship.  He needed his brother to agree to sing, but the stodgy prat was not cooperating.

Sighing, he handed the angel a Cosmopolitan -- he knew his brother was partial to cocktails -- before pouring himself a stiff drink of Scotch.  “Oh, come on, brother.  What harm can it do?”

“Luci, you know that hearing angels sing can shatter a human’s mind.”  Amenadiel shook his head.  “We can’t take that chance.”

Jamming his hands in his pockets, Lucifer counted to ten and tried to find some patience -- which was not easy, since he was the Devil and had none.  “Look, we’re no longer in the Heavenly Choir, and we won’t be singing hymns to Dad.  We’ll be singing earthy Earth songs.  There won’t be any problem, believe me.”

“But our voices can --”

“Trust me.  It’s possible to keep the divinity out of our voices -- I do it all the time when I’m singing at LUX --”

“You sing at LUX?!”

“Yes, and no one’s head has exploded.”   _Yet._  “All you have to do is pull back on the power and volume, somewhat.”  Lucifer wrapped a friendly arm around Amenadiel’s shoulders.  “Now come on.  The detective’s already signed us up --”

“What?!”  The angel looked appalled.

“You don’t want to disappoint her, do you?”  The Devil tried his best to channel a sad puppy dog.  He wasn’t sure it worked -- he probably just looked constipated -- but he tried.  “The detectives haven’t won in five years -- don’t you think it’s time they won at least once?”

Amenadiel shot him a disgusted look.  “Fine.  Fine!  Just put the puppy dog eyes away.  Sheesh.”

Lucifer beamed at him.  “Thank you, brother!  You won’t regret it!”

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

But Lucifer regretted it.

When they arrived at the bar that Friday, the lieutenant from Vice was already on the stage, making announcements.  Having won the previous year, they were entitled to choose the theme.  Lucifer was all ready to belt out some blues, maybe a little alternative rock.  He was even willing to sing some pop, if need be.  But the theme was none of those things.

It was 70’s disco.

Lucifer wanted to scream in agony.  Disco?   _Disco?!_  The Devil did not sing disco!

The urge to quit right then and there was very great.  But when he looked at Chloe gazing at him with hope shining in her eyes and her face full of excitement, he knew he couldn’t disappoint her.  He turned to his brother with a grimace.

“We’ll have to pick a disco song.”

Amenadiel’s face lit up.  “That’s great!  I love disco!”

Lucifer groaned.  “Right.  Of course you do.”

They watched the pairs sing away.  All the music in general was horrifying to Lucifer since it was disco, and many singers were atrocious -- mostly the detectives, but a few vice guys too.  There were a few decent singers, but only a smattering.  The Devil knew they could win this -- if he could just get over his horror at having to sing disco, the detective would have her trophy in her hands in no time.

As their time to take the stage approached, Lucifer went over the song selection with Amenadiel.

“Right.  We need to sing something with harmony,” he said.  “It’s the surefire way to win.”

“This isn’t just about winning, Luci,” his stodgy brother said.  “It’s about having fun.”

He rolled his eyes.  “No, it’s _all_ about winning, bro.  That detective deserves that trophy and we are going to get it for her.”

“You and your detective.”  Amenadiel shook his head with disgust.  “Okay, whatever.  You realize we’ll have to sing a Bee Gees song if you want good harmony.”

Lucifer’s insides shriveled up and died.  Bloody hell, what had he ever done to deserve this?  Well, at least they weren’t making him wear butterfly collars and bell bottoms....

When they were called up to the stage, he cleared his throat as he took a mic and handed another to Amenadiel.  “Here we go.”

The deejay started the karaoke and the pair of angels belted out “Staying Alive.”  Even though he hated disco, Lucifer put his heart into it, for Chloe was sitting at the front table, her eyes bright and full of enthusiasm.  Would she be impressed?  He hoped so.  The things he did for her....  Harmonizing beautifully with Amenadiel, Lucifer had to admit that it was almost like being in the Heavenly Choir again -- except for the falsetto voices -- and thankfully, the humans’ heads weren’t exploding, which was a relief.

When they finished, they got a standing ovation, and Lucifer knew without a doubt that they had won the trophy for Chloe.  Grinning at his brother, he clasped Amenadiel on the shoulder and said, “Thank you.”

The angel looked surprised at his words, then a slow smile lit his face.  “You’re welcome.”

After the detective division was announced the winner and the trophy ceremoniously handed over to Lieutenant Monroe, everyone begged Lucifer and Amenadiel for an encore.  The fallen angel was very tempted to sing something in a different style -- blues!  Pop! -- but Amenadiel insisted they keep to the theme of the night.  The Devil supposed his brother had a point.  He had already sung dreaded disco -- one more song wouldn’t hurt.

“But no more Bee Gees,” he said to his brother, holding up his index finger, before turning to the deejay.  “Queue up Disco Inferno!”

Amenadiel cringed.  “Awww, Luci, no....  Why don’t we sing ‘Heaven Must be Missing an Angel’ instead?”

The fallen angel pulled a face.  “Ugh.  Please.  None of that!  If we’re singing disco, then we have to sing something devilish, brother!  You should be happy -- it’s still disco!”

“Yes, but --”

Lucifer wasn’t listening.  “Detective!”  He waved to Chloe.  “Come on up!”

Giving him a big smile, she shook her head and yelled back, “No way!”

The Devil wasn’t one to take no for an answer.  Hopping off the stage, he grabbed her hand and pulled her up.  “Come on, Detective!  We won the trophy for you!  Live a little!”

Her laughter rang out like bells.  “No, Lucifer!  I don’t belong here --”

“Yes, you do!”  He started shimmying and shaking in front of her.  “If you can’t sing, you can at least dance!”

Although she covered her face, she was grinning.  He saw her red cheeks and laughed, charmed by her blush.  Nodding to the deejay, he started to sing with Amenadiel.

“Burn, baby, burn....”

The festivities didn’t end there.  They ended up singing song after song -- unfortunately, all disco -- but Lucifer didn’t care.  Chloe laughed as she danced with him, and his heart thumped in double-time at the sight of her so radiantly happy.

It was a night he knew he would never forget, for he had won the prize for his detective, and that was all that mattered to the Devil.

  



End file.
